Wednesday, July 26, 2006

26 July 2006

Took 1hr+ off time from work today to come home & rest due to the coughs I HAVE! I only cough when I am in office...though once awhile back home or on the train...the coughs make me feel dizzy & it seems to turn my maigrains up on my head! Really terrible headaches in office...tried to take some rest in office but it doesnt seems to work...so come home & rest!

Anyway feeling better nw after some gd napping! I wonder will it be the same @ office tml!
Receive a letter of service frm CMPB. I am to report for my enlistment on coming 7 Oct 2006, Saturday at 8am. I am going to BMT school 1...wonder how the welfare at there gd anot?

I am looking forward to my enlistment but whats on my mind nw is abt...will SHE turned up to send me off for enlistment or even come to visit me on the 1st few weeks of training??? I got 5 tickets for visit entry! Haiz doubt she will turned up too...so just forget about asking her...same answer as usual from her..

I wonder y I can be perfect in the things I do & can tell people how to deal with relationship but when it happens on me, I cant handle it at all!!! I envy couples on the streets that spend their time togther holding hands, going out, eating together....I yearn for all of these activities with her but it seems like no chance... why other boys get to enjoy yet I dont really enjoy? I am not complaining but I jus wished to spend more time with you whenever possible. I am trying to be the best & perfect bf but I know I cant do it...I am demanding & bad tempered at times..I apologise but I really dont know hw to face you at times...mayb my love for was wrong? I am always wrong...trying to be perfect in everything...anyway love is always like this for me...when you dont have a relationship, you want it badly but when you have it, we hope there is no problems but always sweetness...

Tell me what to do my friends....I am feeling ........dotz dotz dotz